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Vladimir Putin not sick after all Printer friendly page Print This
By Paul Richard Harris, Axis of Logic
Axis of Logic
Friday, Feb 6, 2015

As news rocketed round the world yesterday of the illness suffered by Russian leader Vladimir Putin, condolences poured in from well-wishers and foreign leaders. Putin was said to be grateful for the kind thoughts, but somewhat puzzled as the reports were claiming he suffers from a disease that no longer exists.

The reports indicated that Putin suffers from Aspberger's Syndrome (or Aspberger's Disorder). Aspberger's is a variation on autism spectrum disorder distinguished by a pattern of symptoms rather than a single symptom. It is characterized by qualitative impairment in social interaction, by stereotyped and restricted patterns of behavior, activities and interests, and by no clinically significant delay in cognitive development or general delay in language. Intense preoccupation with a narrow subject, one-sided verbosity, restricted prosody, and physical clumsiness are typical of the condition, but are not required for diagnosis. In short, the ailment makes the patient behave pretty much like the rest of us do from time to time.

However, the fifth edition of the bible of psychiatric conditions -  Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (known as DSM-5) removed Aspberger's as a valid medical diagnosis in 2013. When told of this, Putin is said to have been elated and relieved to know that what is wrong with him is no longer something that can be wrong with him.

Once again expressing his gratitude for worldwide concern for his well being, Putin suggested it would be more appropriate for people to turn their attention to the ongoing medical problems suffered by the president of the United States.

"I like Mr Obama," said Putin. "It grieves me to see him struggling daily with the burden of being a tall, black dickhead. I wish people could take some time out of their days to wish him well."

Meanwhile, observers have noted that Putin does not seem to be daunted in his efforts to continue being the awesome leader of Russia.

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